Alena Mae's Index (a la Harper's) On Her Birthday
Number of swimming, gymnastics, or music classes Lena's brother was enrolled in during his first year: 5
Number of swimming, gymnastics, or music classes Lena was enrolled in during her first year: 0
Number of peers Lena's brother has in his age group: 12
Minimum number of times Lena's brother sees his peer group, on average, per month: 6
Number of peers Lena has, in her own age group: 1
Total number of play dates Lena has had with this peer during the past year: 5
Total number of articles of clothing specifically purchased for Lena by her parents: 3
Minimum percentage of Lena's clothes that have been handed down to her: 75
Number of diapers changed by Lena's parents in 2002: 0
Minimum number of diapers changed by Lena's parents since April, 2005: 3,468
Number of tubes of Boudreaux's Butt Paste purchased and used by the Cryar-Roes since April, 2005: 4
Percentage change in the amount of laundry in the Cryar-Roe home since Lena’s arrival, estimated logically: +25
Percentage change in the amount of laundry in the Cryar-Roe home since Lena’s arrival, estimated emotionally (i.e. what it feels like): +90
Average number of things pulled from Lena’s mouth by her mother on a daily basis: 6
Number of these things that should be consumed by a child: 0
Estimated minimum number of dog food pellets Lena has ingested before her mother could retrieve them in time: 17
Minimum number of hours Lena's parents have spent at happy hours since August, 2003: 3
Minimum number of hours Lena's parents have spent in the Pediatric waiting room since August, 2003: 3.67
Average number of books read yearly by Lena's mother before Eli's birth: 24
Number read in full in the year since Lena's birth: 4
Percentage of those related to childcare: 75
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to sleep in her own bed: 7
Rank of 2005 among years that Lena's parents suffered a severe lack of sleep: 1
Current average of consecutive hours of nightly sleep Lena's parents get: 6
Likely number of maximum remaining months until Lena is weaned from breast milk: 4
Likely minimum number of hours her mother will spend crying when Lena is weaned from breast milk: 2.5
Likely minimum number of margaritas her mother will drink in bitter-sweet celebration when Lena is weaned from breast milk: 3
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to crawl: 8
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to walk: 11
Number of birthmarks beautifully located on Lena's ample bottom: 1
Age, in years, at which this birthmark is discovered by someone other than Lena's father, according to her father's most heartfelt wish: 30
Minimum number of times per day Lena makes her parents smile:
12
Chance that Lena's parents will go for baby #3:
1 in 1,000,000
Percentage likelihood that they would be happy should they get pregnant anyway:
100
Other babies on the planet like Alena Mae:
0
Birthdays celebrated by Alena Mae as of April 25, 2006: 1
Number of swimming, gymnastics, or music classes Lena was enrolled in during her first year: 0
Number of peers Lena's brother has in his age group: 12
Minimum number of times Lena's brother sees his peer group, on average, per month: 6
Number of peers Lena has, in her own age group: 1
Total number of play dates Lena has had with this peer during the past year: 5
Total number of articles of clothing specifically purchased for Lena by her parents: 3
Minimum percentage of Lena's clothes that have been handed down to her: 75
Number of diapers changed by Lena's parents in 2002: 0
Minimum number of diapers changed by Lena's parents since April, 2005: 3,468
Number of tubes of Boudreaux's Butt Paste purchased and used by the Cryar-Roes since April, 2005: 4
Percentage change in the amount of laundry in the Cryar-Roe home since Lena’s arrival, estimated logically: +25
Percentage change in the amount of laundry in the Cryar-Roe home since Lena’s arrival, estimated emotionally (i.e. what it feels like): +90
Average number of things pulled from Lena’s mouth by her mother on a daily basis: 6
Number of these things that should be consumed by a child: 0
Estimated minimum number of dog food pellets Lena has ingested before her mother could retrieve them in time: 17
Minimum number of hours Lena's parents have spent at happy hours since August, 2003: 3
Minimum number of hours Lena's parents have spent in the Pediatric waiting room since August, 2003: 3.67
Average number of books read yearly by Lena's mother before Eli's birth: 24
Number read in full in the year since Lena's birth: 4
Percentage of those related to childcare: 75
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to sleep in her own bed: 7
Rank of 2005 among years that Lena's parents suffered a severe lack of sleep: 1
Current average of consecutive hours of nightly sleep Lena's parents get: 6
Likely number of maximum remaining months until Lena is weaned from breast milk: 4
Likely minimum number of hours her mother will spend crying when Lena is weaned from breast milk: 2.5
Likely minimum number of margaritas her mother will drink in bitter-sweet celebration when Lena is weaned from breast milk: 3
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to crawl: 8
Age, in months, at which Lena learned to walk: 11
Number of birthmarks beautifully located on Lena's ample bottom: 1
Age, in years, at which this birthmark is discovered by someone other than Lena's father, according to her father's most heartfelt wish: 30
Minimum number of times per day Lena makes her parents smile: 12
Chance that Lena's parents will go for baby #3:
1 in 1,000,000
Percentage likelihood that they would be happy should they get pregnant anyway:
100
Other babies on the planet like Alena Mae:
0
Birthdays celebrated by Alena Mae as of April 25, 2006: 1
Comments
I can really relate to your "stats" for Lena too. It sounds like Natalie. I've had major guilt lately about how many activities her brother is involved in and how few she is. The older Eli gets, the more you'll see this. It's exhausting!
I was sorting all my boys' keepsakes into boxes a while back and boy #1's box is full (he has about 4 baby books) while boy #3's is practically empty (he has about 1/2 a baby book). I had to remind myself that boy #1 has 4 years on boy #3 and #3 will fill his box, too. Maybe just a little more slowly...
BTW, babies just keep getting better and better each time ;-). It doesn't make sense to stop having them just when you're getting good at it!
Oh! and of course!
Happy Birthday Lena!