Well, I Never

• I've never read Moby Dick or The Catcher in the Rye or Madame Bovary. I have intended to for years.


• I've never stolen anything.


• I've never truly finished a short story. I just start and start and start them again. Nothing has ever been good enough to call done.


• I've never seen through my desire to understand and play music.


• I've never cared much about money or stuff or having things. I've never taken care of my things very well.


• I've never done X or crack or heroin. I don't plan to.


• I've never seen the bats fly out from under the Congress Street Bridge in Austin.


• I've never been water skiing.


• I've never ridden in a hot air balloon.


• I've never gone skinny dipping.


• I've never worn a pair of high heels without feeling a constant paranoia that I would fall down.


• I've never been bungee jumping or sky diving (and I never will). Not that it wouldn't be fun. That's just a stupid way to die.


• I've never been to Greece or Ireland. Or Rome or Boston. I'd like to.


• I've never been able to gamble without getting a stomach ache.


• I've never felt as informed or as confident as I should when I vote.


• I've never believed I am as beautiful as my loved ones tell me I am.


• I've never been bothered by my age or a birthday or what I have or haven't done with my years. Until recently.